Its now 5:00 am on Friday morning. The drugs I am on have completely confused my body clock. I cannot sleep for more than 2 hours in a row. I know I will be knackered later but trying to sleep is futile so have decided to get up.
Yesterday I was taken back by my friends generosity... A group had got together and gone and got me a xbox 360... Its a unbelievable gift, one that will help me pass the time over the next few weeks. AJ popped it round on Wednesday night.. Thursday morning I put on a OB's tour shirt to head to hospital, I've never been so proud to put on a rugby shirt... a club and friends who do that bit extra for each other. I will owe more than a few beers to people when I'm through this.
Wibbles and Emma came down during the week, plans for celebrations are already underway. Stock car racing at his parents will be hilarious. Its good to see them and I am glad to show them that I still look well.
This week has seen a few more side effects kick in. None that bad... Wake up each morning with pains in joints from where toxins build up, legs are tired most of the time and have a mild hangover (this could be just withdrawal symptoms from not drinking for 4 weeks now). I'm still eating like a horse, have not had any sickness and have been turning down the anti-sickness drugs, also my hair is the longest it has been for 10 years. Its almost a mullet now. I was expected to lose it last week. I could be the first Chemo patient with a mullet!!
I have still been asking if I can do any work from home. But am starting to realise that its not going to happen. Everything is now revolving around blood counts, how I'm feeling. Any work I got given would be deadline driven and I can't guarantee I can meet any?? Its frustrating and makes me feel slightly useless but I need to find other things to occupy me.
Hospital has me booked in for the whole of Thursday, I'm due 2 units of blood, ambazone, platelets and Chemotherpy. Its going to be a long day. This is not helped when the my body seems reluctant to give a blood sample. Despite last weeks operation the tubes from my chest won't allow the nurses to get a sample. I have to pump the opposite arm and breath deeply to get blood to flow... I'm sat in the middle if the ward doing a water pump impression until they have enough blood. I'm hoping this clears up otherwise I might be in for another operation.
The remainder of the treatments go well, just plug in and wait. Read all of Jono Lomu's autobiography in a day. Will be in need of more books again soon. I see Merv, who was admitted shortly after I was diagnosed, he had been in isolation since the 8th October and only just been allowed out. That's what I thought was going to happen to me. Thank God it didn't I would have gone insane. He is getting through the treatment quite well and has also gone a bit OCD. Also see Karl on my way in.. he is attached to a drip sat outside the hospital smoking a fag. Feel like giving him a slap for been so stupid.
Weekend is coming up, Sarah is doing a houseparty and its Ronan's stag. I would like to make a token appearance to both, but however the closer the time gets I realise its not a good idea. The will be other party's, going along will just be putting myself at risk, I've been lucky so far and want to be able to remain at home for as much of the treatment as possible. Picking up a silly infection would be a big set back. For the moment I still need to be "bubble boy". I'm not liking the isolation this causes. I crave been able to head out, not worry if who I talk to has a cold, not worry if glasses would be clean. Having a relaxing social night out seems months away.. Bugger.
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